Wednesday, November 18, 2009

The last gasp of the twenties...

As the last moments of my twenties passes through my fingers like sand, I decided that perhaps it was appropriate to blog. Why? I guess it's because it's one of those moments I didn't see coming and I thought it might serve as a warning to others coming down the pike. I remember when I was a teen thinking that thirty was going to be this amazing right of passage...and maybe it is, but I'm currently failing to see it. It's nothing like I expected (late twenties going into the acceptance of my adult life), but at the same time it's better than I knew to imagine, so I guess there's always that. I'm in no way unhappy with my life, so don't be misled by what I'm about to say.
It's sad to see the twenties go. To know that they are truly over. The coming of age part of life is terrible and wonderful, filled with trials and tests of self. I could see how I could be glad that I have a much better idea of who I am than when I headed into the hot mess that is twenty.

And at this moment I am 30 (7:20am is official to the sticklers).

I don't know why 30 is so hard. It's the first time I have been inclined to not throw myself a party. I still don't know if it will happen to be honest. I know I am not alone. I've watched some of my closest friends turn 30 and most have seemed to approach it with reverence and a certain amount of dread. What is it about our culture that this age that is so scary? My status on facebook today was "Today is the last day of my twenties...ever". I got a fair bit of jeering from the younger crowd, but it was the older crowd that got me. Almost every one of them said something about that day for them. It was a sobering moment for the majority of them. But what is it?
I'm still unsure and I've been thinking about it all day. Is it that as long as there's a '2' in the front end of your age you still feel like you can get away with certain things? Is it that the '3' magically means that you are supposed to have something figured out by now? Jury's out.

All I know is that me and the twenties had the best of times and the worst of times and I will miss you. I raise my lighter to you....