Sunday, November 16, 2008

A day off...from everything but guilt

So, it's Sunday. I'm not where I should be, even though I don't have any plans. You know the feeling....where there's something you've been putting off or someone or some place you have been avoiding, but you talk yourself out of it time after time. I have at least a few of those that are backing up on me this morning. Church, my grandma's, and my parents' house. I'm not totally sure what my reservations are on any of those counts. It's not like I will encounter unpleasantries at any of those places, especially the latter. The only thing I can think of is guilt. 
Competition season makes it easier to rationalize. I'm really busy. They all know I am busy. I know they understand. I drive a lot already, and I know they understand that. I guess what makes me guilty is that I don't really do much on Sunday. I sleep in a little (10:20 this morning). I make breakfast (in this case all I had to do was heat up some of my breakfast casserole leftovers). I indulge in some activity as I eat (today, New Moon...I couldn't stop myself). I take a shower at some point, as I rather enjoy being clean, for no one but myself. If I don't go anywhere, I will most likely finish the next installment of the dark teenage romance novel series...even though I bought it yesterday morning.  
The guilt. It, however, will not go away. It will gnaw at me gently as I continue about my lazy day. I will continue to try to distract myself, be it through a book, movie, video game, or blogging. Ugh. 
I'm going to go get my keys....

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